Calm

I apologize if you were unable to access my blog recently. Jason borked it.

To make you feel better I have pictures to post! Yay! Maybe even a fun slideshow?? We went to NC last week and went whitewater rafting, but first I will post my thoughts about a particular issue that seems to take precedence.

Patrick left for PA Monday. We now have children 24/7. It is wonderful. :o) Patrick having the kids full-time was a bit unconventional for divorced parents and visitation, but God uses all things to the good. The kids got to live with their father! I got to see what it would be like WITHOUT them! Patrick moved away. Yes I count this as a good thing, because it wasn’t looking like the back and forth was going to work out so well. Holidays and Summers (if, if, if) will be just enough time with them.

Jason and I have read this book by John Rosemond called Parenting by the Book. It is not a how to with “1,2,3 Magic” it is a scripture based and frank-talkin’ thinker book. There are questions at the end of the chapters that Jason and I discussed and it shed a LOT of light on my parenting then and now. Jason and I were also able to get on the same page when it comes to discipline which feels like half the battle!

Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart. Proverbs 29:17 I can’t really say when my children have been a delight. There were moments recently, but the weariness of my soul and the anger in my heart would not allow me to be at peace. I would definitely exasperate my children with trying to control them and make them into perfect little robots. As a result, they are very good. Most of the time they do as they are told, but almost like robots. If robots whine and scream sometimes… This past month I grew. I grew in patience, self-discipline, and healing. I learned to “let go and let God,” if you will.

There were some very dark moments during the first few months of being a single mom. Noah remembers these moments (cause he’s a freakin’ elephant or something!) and I knew they had effected him. Last night I was able to start reconnecting with Noah. One thing I figured out from reading the book, besides Tell and Compel, was that there are different stages of growth with your children and at the moment playtime and tickling and books is great for Nora, but Noah needs communication. He needs one on one conversations that lead wherever he takes them. He still needs discipline, but the kids grow so quickly! I want Noah to trust me and to look up to me. That will come with time-time I am glad to have.

I can sense that I am a different mom. I play more with the kids and can compel them to listen to me without flying off the handle. Also being able to release Patrick to go off and do his own thing helps. I can’t make him be a good father although I tried! Not caring what Patrick’s household looked like or trying to correct anything he did helps us to develop our own family unit. Right now the TV is borked too and it is so nice. Just before bed is story time on the couch. It is a place to sit together instead of a place to zone out to the TV together. It has not been long, but I think the kids can already tell that life at our house is different. The mouse is still alive in case you were wondering.

One thought on “Calm

  1. I know we have differences. I read this and smiled. You are doing an amazing job. I love the sentence about the different stages. I now have four teenagers and what a stage. I have recently started allowing the Lord to work through things in my life. Keep up the great work Danielle!!!!

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