I changed my peek a boo. I’ve been coloring my streak for about a year now, can you believe it? It was aqua for a long, long, time and then when I went to the salon my stylist dyed it a deeper blue. I didn’t love it, but it gave my hair time to grow and calm down after too much bleaching. I was ready for a change. This color is called Fuchsia and it’s pinky-purple and bright and fun to me. I need some bright amidst the cloudiness that has become my days.
These past few months have been rough. We’ve had a lot going on with moving and making that decision as well as some personal stuff. I’ve had a few crazy things happen like being dragged into a court judgement for having the same first and last name as the defendant’s wife and other stuff I won’t go into, but suffice it to say I’ve felt the universe is against me or I’m supposed to be learning how to be easy-breezy and unprovoked. Everything that has happened to me has felt out of my control, either another person’s mistake or judgement or personal issue. I’m learning to be okay with other people’s opinions of me. (So hard!) I want so much to defend myself, but some people cannot be persuaded. I have to learn to be okay with that, apparently.
It’s easy to get down on myself. Jason is very busy with school and working on the new house, so we are still not communicating very well. Staying at home is hard for me sometimes because I feel so easily lost in the day to day especially lately when all of my creative items are packed up and I can’t yet work towards anything. All of that should change this weekend *crosses fingers* as we finish moving. We took a lot of stuff to the house last weekend, so the house here is quite empty. It’s kind of nice not to have a lot of clutter! A lot easier to keep clean too!
After my hope to cut back on my fb usage I found myself back in the habit. Fb makes me a little crazy, as I have already told you, so I deleted the app on my phone completely and I took it off of my bookmarks. My new mantra, which I found while researching how to take a break from fb is, “I don’t need Facebook and Facebook doesn’t need me”. It’s perfect. Posting things on fb feels to me like a shout in the void. It’s a blip on the screen and then it is gone. I’m not adding anything to anyone’s life. I would much rather use my time productively or gather more than one random thought in this space. I still have not deactivated my account and I don’t plan to either because I’m involved in a couple of groups that keep people updated via fb and deactivating it is not what would keep me away and I’ve found that It’s easier for me to stay away from fb entirely rather than limit the usage.
I hope to post pictures soon of the new house. We’ve been back and forth with boxes and things and one of those times I grabbed a picture of Henry on the porch. I love the natural light and look forward to seeing more sunshine!