Retail Therapy

T o say that I was sad to see the kids go to their dad’s for the summer would be an understatement. The feeling of emptiness I had while walking back to my car after dropping them off with Patrick was overwhelming. I am not loving working for Starbucks again and the house is too quiet. Depression has quickly set in. My days have been spent reading the Twilight Saga and watching (sortof) TV and movies. I would normally be running straight home after work to pick up Noah from school, but now… I could sit at Starbucks all day if I wanted too. That may sound like a dream to some, but to me it was a bit of a nightmare. I enjoy picking up Noah and I did not feel that I needed a break from them. Maybe a date night sure, but not two months off of mom-duty. Although our trip to NC alone was lovely, the kids can come home now.

Jason has been working a lot too. We finally did get a date night this past Friday evening, but I had to be home early to work at 6am the next morning. We still had a good time at Carrabba’s for dinner and catching the flick Killers. Going to the movies is a real treat, but dinner and a movie in the same night?? WOOT! lol It helped lift my mood a bit. I try to make myself get out of the house, but have yet to knit anything. That to me is the sign of depression. Not doing things I love. Yesterday, after church, my mom and I went shopping. It is rare to hang out with my mom without the kiddos, so we enjoyed the quietness of going to grownup stores without screaming children. We were searching for presents for Jason’s Birthday and found a few items for ourselves. I think doing something out of the ordinary routine and treating myself to a cute shirt and a much-needed new pair of sunglasses helped dig me out a little bit more. Slowly but surely I am beginning to feel like myself again. I’m not there yet, but I’m feeling better.

Sadly, Noah won’t talk to me. Nora wants to come home and doesn’t understand why I haven’t come to pick her up yet, but maybe they are also settling in too. I’m still making bets that they won’t last month in Colorado, but we’ll see. Supposedly they have plans for camping and the zoo and something called Wild Adventures? I’ve never been to Colorado, but my aunt goes twice a year or more, so I know it is beautiful. I hope the kids are being well taken care of and filling up on time with their dad. They do miss him too when they are with me.

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